YES, YES, YES...JESUS IS MY KING!
However...God has given me a man who makes me feel like his QUEEN here on earth. This is my dear husband Ken-Jim (Kenneth James Fisher).
I've been dealing with bi-polar for MANY years, but this summer finally began mood stabilizers. (If you've read my second post of September you may understand this more?) In June I became aware of my mistaken medication problem and WANTED to leave my husband...SO THAT HE WOULDN'T HAVE TO GO THROUGH ANY MORE OF MY ILLNESS! He is HERE and he's STAYING! AMEN! God has "provided" for me.
At the moment I'm listening to the Sound Track of the movie "The King and I"...the one with Yul Brenner. Jim (aka...Ken or James or Dad or...whatever!) bought me the LP (Instead of CD's we had what's called long playing records or LP's.)during our "courtship" much of this music burrowed itself into my heart. I'm just now realizing that the thoughts I had of LOVE way back in the 60's were going to grow SO MUCH MORE in the years to come.
I am blessed and I'm doing much better with my new meds. I am SO GLAD I didn't LEAVE in June...and that I've got the rest of my life to spend with this TRUELY WONDERFUL MAN.
Ken wasn't a Christian when we met and for many years into our marriage. He became a TRUE Christian and has grown SO MUCH more in the past several years. He was ALWAYS a GREAT MAN and always much more patient and caring than me! I learned FROM him what it means to "walk the walk" as I "reprised" the lessons learned from many years of Sunday school lessons. He's taught me so much more about the Bible and HOW to apply it's content. These lessons were taught and learned earlier, but now I know much more about the APPLICATION of those lessons through Ken's "walk". (Growing older DOES have it's "perks"! We see things from a new perspective.)
Anyway...the music in this CD is so SPECIAL to me. The long ago LP has been missed and now I have it to enjoy again...EVEN MORE with 40 years of marriage behind us and however many we have "left" ahead. Even when "one of us is gone and one is left to carry one" I KNOW that this love will continue to PROVIDE for whoever is "leftover". We have a "sort of contest" going. Whoever is "leftover" is the loser, but they are not to be sad for the winner...BECAUSE the winner will await the loser in Heaven!
I wish the BEST to all of you MARRIED or about to be...Take a listen sometime to this wonderful musical about true love, which also reminds ME that God gives SO MUCH to us by HIS LOVE. THANK YOU GOD FOR KENNETH JAMES FISHER!
(Sometimes music doesn't have to be Christian to "speak to us" and I've OFTEN made LOVE songs "Christian" as I simply substitute GOD as the LOVER and the LOVED ONE! After all, God is the source of ALL love, so GOD BLESS YOU ALL!)
ALANE SAYS...and THANKS James for ALL you do and most of all for ALL you are to me!
Saturday, October 31, 2009
Wednesday, October 28, 2009
Another week gone...since last Weds.
Hello again...
I'm a little bit farther in my "work" at home, but my Mom is now moved into a new apartment in assisted living. Her former "roomie" was just not working out. We had LOTS to "pare down" especially her closet since her new closet is much smaller. We started ahead of the move and then afterwards exchanged dressers for FIT in the new room (There is more "tall room" than width, so she now has more room to get to her closet.)
On top of just needing to clean and do the regular stuff that's been WAITING through my mental illness this past summer, We're preparing to move to NC next July. I've been a KEEPER all my life! I've moved some things to the Salvation Army and we are giving away some things. Selling is just not worth what people WANT to spend and the Sal appreciates STUFF. This also works a lot FASTER than trying to SELL!
AND...I'm sorting through TONS of pictures from my mother's albums. One of my sisters spent two "sessions" with me while her husband helped mine finish the seams in our garage. (Another sister helped start this project when she visited PA in August from Florida.).We've been in this house for over 11 yrs. and it's TIME to get ready to "put it on the market" in the spring. (I'm going to scan the pictures that I want to return to my Mom and to my aunt who took many of them years ago. Also planning to make CD's to share with my sisters and brother.) My aunt immigrated (She was almost 19 yrs. old.)from Panama in the spring before my birth in July of 1949. She happened to go on a day trip to Pittsburgh with a friend (Charlotte, who lives just down the street from my mother-in-law now!)the day I was born and wasn't available to help with my two older sisters. She's been and will ALWAYS be my favorite Aunt. I've learned a lot about my family in this process. SO...I continue to sort before I'm able to scan and share with my family and so we'll all have pictures of our past!
Meanwhile I'm trying to get a GRIP on my bi-polar. I'm up to 200 mg of Lamictal (the generic is Lomotrigine) and HOPEFULLY won't have to go up much higher. (I had a bit of a "melt-down" on Monday, but those days are fewer now.) It feels SO GOOD to do even ONE thing each day and NOW I'm able to do more. However I AM challenged with all I've got ahead of me. I've let things go for a LONG time. Even before my new meds, I wasn't very good at accomplishing much at all. I'm now noticing that I can pull-off more and I'm not so apt to just LAY THINGS DOWN, but rather take care of stuff AS I GO! I used to be SO bent on organization and now I'd like to return to a BIT of that. I was TOO "bent" in the past when my kidlets were growing up. However, I am PROUD of my ability to function for 34 years on JUST anti-depressants when I NEEDED mood-stabilizers to work on BOTH parts of the BI polar! I DO feel I was a good mother, but I DO have plenty behind me...that usually I'm able to let stay in the past. I am hoping to POINT people to the RIGHT help and to create some understanding for anyone with a friend or relative who suffers from ANY type of mental disability.
Well...gonna go attack the bank statement and then my husband and I are volunteering for the second time at the 2nd Harvest Foodbank in Erie, PA...a JOB we've wanted to do in his retirement. He's only partially retired, but we wanted to get started on this now. We will be full timers next summer in North Carolina, so we're creating our resumes! HA HA! The TV tells us lately to GIVE some volunteer time, but I've always wanted to do that. In the past I did some work at our hospital as an escort, taking patients to their hospital rooms upon admission. I was preganant with our second daughter at the time and I worked on Sunday afternoons. It was GOOD to give, since not many volunteers are available on the weekends. My husband enjoyed the peaceful Sundays at home with our then 2 yr. old daughter. So...Do something nice for someone today...even if just for a few minutes. Our gift of time is only 1 and 1/2 hrs. a week, but like the starfish story "IT MATTERS!". (Starfish wash up onto beaches and if tossed back into the water have a chance to survive. When watching someone do this...they were asked WHY...since there were SO MANY starfish to "toss" The TOSSER said, "It mattered to that one!" I try to remember this when I do what I consider JUST a little to help!)
Thank you once again for reading Alane Says...I appreciate that!
I'm a little bit farther in my "work" at home, but my Mom is now moved into a new apartment in assisted living. Her former "roomie" was just not working out. We had LOTS to "pare down" especially her closet since her new closet is much smaller. We started ahead of the move and then afterwards exchanged dressers for FIT in the new room (There is more "tall room" than width, so she now has more room to get to her closet.)
On top of just needing to clean and do the regular stuff that's been WAITING through my mental illness this past summer, We're preparing to move to NC next July. I've been a KEEPER all my life! I've moved some things to the Salvation Army and we are giving away some things. Selling is just not worth what people WANT to spend and the Sal appreciates STUFF. This also works a lot FASTER than trying to SELL!
AND...I'm sorting through TONS of pictures from my mother's albums. One of my sisters spent two "sessions" with me while her husband helped mine finish the seams in our garage. (Another sister helped start this project when she visited PA in August from Florida.).We've been in this house for over 11 yrs. and it's TIME to get ready to "put it on the market" in the spring. (I'm going to scan the pictures that I want to return to my Mom and to my aunt who took many of them years ago. Also planning to make CD's to share with my sisters and brother.) My aunt immigrated (She was almost 19 yrs. old.)from Panama in the spring before my birth in July of 1949. She happened to go on a day trip to Pittsburgh with a friend (Charlotte, who lives just down the street from my mother-in-law now!)the day I was born and wasn't available to help with my two older sisters. She's been and will ALWAYS be my favorite Aunt. I've learned a lot about my family in this process. SO...I continue to sort before I'm able to scan and share with my family and so we'll all have pictures of our past!
Meanwhile I'm trying to get a GRIP on my bi-polar. I'm up to 200 mg of Lamictal (the generic is Lomotrigine) and HOPEFULLY won't have to go up much higher. (I had a bit of a "melt-down" on Monday, but those days are fewer now.) It feels SO GOOD to do even ONE thing each day and NOW I'm able to do more. However I AM challenged with all I've got ahead of me. I've let things go for a LONG time. Even before my new meds, I wasn't very good at accomplishing much at all. I'm now noticing that I can pull-off more and I'm not so apt to just LAY THINGS DOWN, but rather take care of stuff AS I GO! I used to be SO bent on organization and now I'd like to return to a BIT of that. I was TOO "bent" in the past when my kidlets were growing up. However, I am PROUD of my ability to function for 34 years on JUST anti-depressants when I NEEDED mood-stabilizers to work on BOTH parts of the BI polar! I DO feel I was a good mother, but I DO have plenty behind me...that usually I'm able to let stay in the past. I am hoping to POINT people to the RIGHT help and to create some understanding for anyone with a friend or relative who suffers from ANY type of mental disability.
Well...gonna go attack the bank statement and then my husband and I are volunteering for the second time at the 2nd Harvest Foodbank in Erie, PA...a JOB we've wanted to do in his retirement. He's only partially retired, but we wanted to get started on this now. We will be full timers next summer in North Carolina, so we're creating our resumes! HA HA! The TV tells us lately to GIVE some volunteer time, but I've always wanted to do that. In the past I did some work at our hospital as an escort, taking patients to their hospital rooms upon admission. I was preganant with our second daughter at the time and I worked on Sunday afternoons. It was GOOD to give, since not many volunteers are available on the weekends. My husband enjoyed the peaceful Sundays at home with our then 2 yr. old daughter. So...Do something nice for someone today...even if just for a few minutes. Our gift of time is only 1 and 1/2 hrs. a week, but like the starfish story "IT MATTERS!". (Starfish wash up onto beaches and if tossed back into the water have a chance to survive. When watching someone do this...they were asked WHY...since there were SO MANY starfish to "toss" The TOSSER said, "It mattered to that one!" I try to remember this when I do what I consider JUST a little to help!)
Thank you once again for reading Alane Says...I appreciate that!
Thursday, October 22, 2009
Relationship Improving...
Just a quick one...to let you know that my relationship with my daughter IS improving. It's going to take TIME, but we are both comfortable with taking time!
I want people to know that it does take time and effort to repair broken STUFF...and people are the most difficult to repair. SO...Have patience, take the time and PRAY. NOT IN THAT ORDER, but DO all three. YOU WON'T regret it.
One more thing...IF someone is angry it usually means they CARE and they WANT to work things out. Just keep in mind that the doors have to open on both sides in order to "connect"...and sometimes the WAY we do this is to not try to tackle of a lot of negative things and just BE. We all have a desire for that, I think!
Alane Says...Have a great day and along with trying to get something DONE, take time to ponder HOW you can be a BLESSING to someone...TODAY! That's more important than anything else! Love to ALL...God's GRACE is sufficient to COVER us ALL!!!
I want people to know that it does take time and effort to repair broken STUFF...and people are the most difficult to repair. SO...Have patience, take the time and PRAY. NOT IN THAT ORDER, but DO all three. YOU WON'T regret it.
One more thing...IF someone is angry it usually means they CARE and they WANT to work things out. Just keep in mind that the doors have to open on both sides in order to "connect"...and sometimes the WAY we do this is to not try to tackle of a lot of negative things and just BE. We all have a desire for that, I think!
Alane Says...Have a great day and along with trying to get something DONE, take time to ponder HOW you can be a BLESSING to someone...TODAY! That's more important than anything else! Love to ALL...God's GRACE is sufficient to COVER us ALL!!!
Wednesday, October 21, 2009
Happy Anniversary...
Today would have been 65 years for my parents! My father has been "gone" for over 24 years, so they didn't get to celebrate their 50th, either. HOWEVER, today I'd like to HONOR THEM here!...I do believe it was a GOOD marriage. My Mom has a GREAT story to tell...and I'm always encouraging her to write it down. I am THRILLED to have known some of the details, but sometimes they aren't perfectly "remembered" by me.
My father was in the Panama Canal Zone with the U.S. Navy and met my mother there. She wouldn't date him until after he'd come into the card shop where she worked for nine months (maybe 8?). I LOVE seeing pictures and imagining them YOUNG and IN LOVE.
My mother immigrated with my father in 1945...about a year after they were married. They were expecting their first child who was born in December, shortly after their arrival to the "states. It was a boat to San Francisco and then a train to cross country and she was "with child".
I never met my grandparents in Panama and she never saw them again. She did return to Panama years later for a visit with her youngest brother and sister and a niece to visit her oldest brother still living there. Just wish I could have gone along, but $ and leaving my kidlets home were just not DO-ABLE. I wouldn't go without my spouse...THE BEST HUSBAND ANYONE COULD HOPE FOR!
My father "sponsored" three of my mother's sisters and one brother to come to live her in the USA with us. I was 5 yrs. OLD and had a "sort of brother" in this UNCLE...The older brother I always wanted and still love DEARLY today. My father did this without the need for my mother to "work" outside the home. She worked PLENTY inside! She canned, froze, sewed, cooked, cleaned, etc. for her own FIVE children AND for her siblings. She always provided and Christmas was always very special...even the year my brother was born when I was 7 yrs. OLD. She had warned us that Santa might not be able to "leave" as much that year! He(SHE) still came through. She made the nicest clothes and sweaters for us and she always had a PILE of toys and clothes for each of us under the tree! LUCKY US!
My father never skipped work. He provided well for us, though we didn't have a lot of money. He was a smiling and loving man who was also violent. I didn't have the BEST relationship with this man, but learned to accept and love him before he died. He told me he loved me and I was so shocked. I told him I loved him and that made me even more shocked...because I MEANT IT! The only other time I remember him expressing love to me was the day of my wedding when I came "tearfully" out to walk down the aisle. He said, "What the Hell's the matter with you!"...and I DID feel that was his expression of love!
You see, some families may not be SAYING love, but that doesn't mean they aren't FEELING it. SO...if you don't HEAR it...don't be so sure it's not there! I am now QUITE verbal about loving my adult children and wish I could have been more expressive when they were young.
My mother showed us love in her sewing, baking, cooking, shopping, ETC...I could go on. She wasn't real outspoken about anything. We knew she loved us though...she SHOWED it. We knew being good and doing well in school were important, but we never got much help from our parents. IT WAS OUR JOB TO GET GOOD GRADES AND TO STAY OUT OF TROUBLE. We didn't ALWAYS do both, by the way. We knew what was right and what was wrong because we were taught!
We always went to church and learned more of this...and I was lucky enough to be in Girl Scouts for many years, where the message of right and wrong was also taught. This helped me to grow and learn, too. My Sunday school teachers and my Youth Fellowship leaders ALSO taught these things to me. MOST OF ALL, I learned that WHEN I "messed up" there's a GOD who forgives and who will never give up on me.
I continue to learn and grow...about GOD and about what my parents TAUGHT me. I recall things at my ripe old age of 60 yrs. (...not necessarily as well as I'd like. Some things from "farther back" come more easily.) I have parented and I've been parented...I've OVER-parented and I'm learning to GRAND PARENT without OVERDOING that, as well. It all takes time and lessons of life don't come easy. We never STOP learning and I SO APPRECIATE the things my KIDLETS are teaching me as they learn more about life from their perspective. We cannot be on the same LEVEL as PEERS, but we sure CAN learn a LOT from each other.
SO HAPPY ANNIVERSARY #65 to my "parental units" and I PRAY that my children and grandchildren can continue to learn from me and from my mistakes.
What do you think of this blog? Email me by clicking on the envelope below or comment if you like. I'D LOVE IT! And that's it for AlaneSays today!
My father was in the Panama Canal Zone with the U.S. Navy and met my mother there. She wouldn't date him until after he'd come into the card shop where she worked for nine months (maybe 8?). I LOVE seeing pictures and imagining them YOUNG and IN LOVE.
My mother immigrated with my father in 1945...about a year after they were married. They were expecting their first child who was born in December, shortly after their arrival to the "states. It was a boat to San Francisco and then a train to cross country and she was "with child".
I never met my grandparents in Panama and she never saw them again. She did return to Panama years later for a visit with her youngest brother and sister and a niece to visit her oldest brother still living there. Just wish I could have gone along, but $ and leaving my kidlets home were just not DO-ABLE. I wouldn't go without my spouse...THE BEST HUSBAND ANYONE COULD HOPE FOR!
My father "sponsored" three of my mother's sisters and one brother to come to live her in the USA with us. I was 5 yrs. OLD and had a "sort of brother" in this UNCLE...The older brother I always wanted and still love DEARLY today. My father did this without the need for my mother to "work" outside the home. She worked PLENTY inside! She canned, froze, sewed, cooked, cleaned, etc. for her own FIVE children AND for her siblings. She always provided and Christmas was always very special...even the year my brother was born when I was 7 yrs. OLD. She had warned us that Santa might not be able to "leave" as much that year! He(SHE) still came through. She made the nicest clothes and sweaters for us and she always had a PILE of toys and clothes for each of us under the tree! LUCKY US!
My father never skipped work. He provided well for us, though we didn't have a lot of money. He was a smiling and loving man who was also violent. I didn't have the BEST relationship with this man, but learned to accept and love him before he died. He told me he loved me and I was so shocked. I told him I loved him and that made me even more shocked...because I MEANT IT! The only other time I remember him expressing love to me was the day of my wedding when I came "tearfully" out to walk down the aisle. He said, "What the Hell's the matter with you!"...and I DID feel that was his expression of love!
You see, some families may not be SAYING love, but that doesn't mean they aren't FEELING it. SO...if you don't HEAR it...don't be so sure it's not there! I am now QUITE verbal about loving my adult children and wish I could have been more expressive when they were young.
My mother showed us love in her sewing, baking, cooking, shopping, ETC...I could go on. She wasn't real outspoken about anything. We knew she loved us though...she SHOWED it. We knew being good and doing well in school were important, but we never got much help from our parents. IT WAS OUR JOB TO GET GOOD GRADES AND TO STAY OUT OF TROUBLE. We didn't ALWAYS do both, by the way. We knew what was right and what was wrong because we were taught!
We always went to church and learned more of this...and I was lucky enough to be in Girl Scouts for many years, where the message of right and wrong was also taught. This helped me to grow and learn, too. My Sunday school teachers and my Youth Fellowship leaders ALSO taught these things to me. MOST OF ALL, I learned that WHEN I "messed up" there's a GOD who forgives and who will never give up on me.
I continue to learn and grow...about GOD and about what my parents TAUGHT me. I recall things at my ripe old age of 60 yrs. (...not necessarily as well as I'd like. Some things from "farther back" come more easily.) I have parented and I've been parented...I've OVER-parented and I'm learning to GRAND PARENT without OVERDOING that, as well. It all takes time and lessons of life don't come easy. We never STOP learning and I SO APPRECIATE the things my KIDLETS are teaching me as they learn more about life from their perspective. We cannot be on the same LEVEL as PEERS, but we sure CAN learn a LOT from each other.
SO HAPPY ANNIVERSARY #65 to my "parental units" and I PRAY that my children and grandchildren can continue to learn from me and from my mistakes.
What do you think of this blog? Email me by clicking on the envelope below or comment if you like. I'D LOVE IT! And that's it for AlaneSays today!
Monday, October 19, 2009
Discouragement...
I am already feeling ready for a re-start of this day! I'm overwhelmed with all I have in front of me...a move AND the things I've been unable to face for a long time. I've not "faced" my housework or the organization I USED to LOVE! I want to be back in that "settled" place...of feeling that things are somewhat "together".
I must remind myself that it's not going to happen overnight. I must do one thing and then move on to another. I must be happy with the progress of EACH thing I accomplish without expecting to do it all today...or even next week...or the next!
Hopefully I can begin to make some progress now that I've gotten this much off my chest! It's good to have someone to listen to me! Thanks!
I must remind myself that it's not going to happen overnight. I must do one thing and then move on to another. I must be happy with the progress of EACH thing I accomplish without expecting to do it all today...or even next week...or the next!
Hopefully I can begin to make some progress now that I've gotten this much off my chest! It's good to have someone to listen to me! Thanks!
Wednesday, October 14, 2009
ANOTHER SONG!
God speaks to me through music...Just thought of my Katie song...at church tonight for a video on Marriage. You're never too OLD to work on this and I've been fortunate to be WED for 40 yrs. to the same wonderous HUBBY! Thanks Ken/James!
The song...was IN the video...when speaking of how women think. We like everything to be perfect and sweet. You know...the girlie kind of "everything is sweet and wonderful"...like our expectations (with husbands in this case, but "transferrable" to other relationships) It's SOMEWHERE OVER THE RAINBOW and I liked it for several reasons...
1) Mothers seem to expect perfection with their kidlets...when trying to teach
stuff. We really don't mean to do that and it's sometimes hard to see that we
love our "offspring" with a really SPECIAL kind of love.
2) "The dreams that you dare to dream really DO come true." No one ever knows
what the future holds, but GOD has a "plan" for everything...Jeremiah 29:11.
We can DREAM...and LOVE gets us through anything!
3) "Over the Rainbow"...We can "go there" if we beleive in Jesus and I am so
HAPPY we share this belief with my family, which includes Katie!
SO THIS ONE IS YOURS, Kaffrom! Good night to all!
The song...was IN the video...when speaking of how women think. We like everything to be perfect and sweet. You know...the girlie kind of "everything is sweet and wonderful"...like our expectations (with husbands in this case, but "transferrable" to other relationships) It's SOMEWHERE OVER THE RAINBOW and I liked it for several reasons...
1) Mothers seem to expect perfection with their kidlets...when trying to teach
stuff. We really don't mean to do that and it's sometimes hard to see that we
love our "offspring" with a really SPECIAL kind of love.
2) "The dreams that you dare to dream really DO come true." No one ever knows
what the future holds, but GOD has a "plan" for everything...Jeremiah 29:11.
We can DREAM...and LOVE gets us through anything!
3) "Over the Rainbow"...We can "go there" if we beleive in Jesus and I am so
HAPPY we share this belief with my family, which includes Katie!
SO THIS ONE IS YOURS, Kaffrom! Good night to all!
DENTS!
In my quest to find a good song for my Katie...I've found another good one for MYSELF! It deals with MY imperfection and maybe some of you "out there" can also relate. The song says "I've got a couple dents in my fender" (not sure of the actual title...Not sure how to spell it, but Cobbie Caleigh? may be close. Heard this on the car radio just a few minutes ago and came inside to hear and SEE her on REGIS AND KELLY! Missed most of that show, but caught this much. LOVE that show and wanted a TASTE of it. We ALL could use some FREEDOM to be ourselves...and we can get that by getting "in-tune" with our Lord and Saviour. My favorite place to do this is GRACE CHURCH in McKean, PA. Anyone can come and learn about TRUE FREEDOM!
I'm a bit upset not to hear from anyone on my "comments" and wondering if some of you would go back to my SECOND post. It's the reason I began this blog. I am wondering if anyone really reads this besides the people I've directed here...I'm not sure how this blog thing works. I want to REACH OUT to others suffering from ANY mental disorders...to GIVE HOPE AND PEACE...things I've discovered since July of this year when I began to get the RIGHT meds after 34 years with my bipolar diagnosis! Sometimes we need physical help with stuff, too...
So...if you can't comment...EMAIL me at jimandnancyf@yahoo.com...I welcome the chance to help anyone COPE and HANG ON! I'm doing much better at last, but still haven't "arrived" I'm nearing the RIGHT dose, but I think I have to have MORE patience to get to the finish line. NORMALCY is something we ALL need and even people LIKE ME...can find that! THANKS FOR LISTENING! DO respond if you are able.
ALANE SAYS
I'm a bit upset not to hear from anyone on my "comments" and wondering if some of you would go back to my SECOND post. It's the reason I began this blog. I am wondering if anyone really reads this besides the people I've directed here...I'm not sure how this blog thing works. I want to REACH OUT to others suffering from ANY mental disorders...to GIVE HOPE AND PEACE...things I've discovered since July of this year when I began to get the RIGHT meds after 34 years with my bipolar diagnosis! Sometimes we need physical help with stuff, too...
So...if you can't comment...EMAIL me at jimandnancyf@yahoo.com...I welcome the chance to help anyone COPE and HANG ON! I'm doing much better at last, but still haven't "arrived" I'm nearing the RIGHT dose, but I think I have to have MORE patience to get to the finish line. NORMALCY is something we ALL need and even people LIKE ME...can find that! THANKS FOR LISTENING! DO respond if you are able.
ALANE SAYS
Sunday, October 11, 2009
Another new week!
Time to begin another new week. I always enjoy my Sundays at Grace Church and feel WELL FED there! I wish everyone had a church to call HOME! Sure do appreciate mine!
Not getting much done at the house as we prepare for our move, but I am getting myself in a much better place with my illness. I am happy to be in touch with my daughter and hope that we continue to learn and grow as we "share" our hearts through email. This should help my mood swings! Being in touch means a lot. Anyone YOU should be in touch with...whoever you are "out there"?
We are fast approaching winter as the days and nights seem pretty cold already. Have to develop our "winter skins", I guess. When I talk to my daughter in Florida I keep thinking she's CHILLED, but it's DIFFERENT there..."Hello to me!" I should know this!
Time to wind down for the night. HAPPY NEW WEEK TO ALL! Alane says!
Not getting much done at the house as we prepare for our move, but I am getting myself in a much better place with my illness. I am happy to be in touch with my daughter and hope that we continue to learn and grow as we "share" our hearts through email. This should help my mood swings! Being in touch means a lot. Anyone YOU should be in touch with...whoever you are "out there"?
We are fast approaching winter as the days and nights seem pretty cold already. Have to develop our "winter skins", I guess. When I talk to my daughter in Florida I keep thinking she's CHILLED, but it's DIFFERENT there..."Hello to me!" I should know this!
Time to wind down for the night. HAPPY NEW WEEK TO ALL! Alane says!
Wednesday, October 7, 2009
Amen...
Well, she saw my blog and we've exchanged a few emails. We will continue to work out the bumps of life that have been thrown our way...and eventually we hope to begin a new relationship. A mother is always pleased to be "in touch" with her "offspring" and I feel that my prayers (and of many others THANK YOU ALL!!!) are being answered.
There is a lot to SAY to each other and to HEAR from each other...but we are going to email till we get there...I am confident that we CAN get there.
My new FAMILY song is OH HOW HE LOVES US...one we've heard much this summer and one that has pulled my husband an myself through this tough time. We all need to be connected with the family God has given to us...It's quite a HUMAN thing. I know that as a mother I NEED that.
MOST of all we need our connection to God...through Jesus. HOPE YOU ALL find YOUR CONNECTION!!!
Thank you for caring enough to read my blog. Some of you may not have read from the BEGINNING, so if you want to further understand the reasons for MY blog...GO THERE. It's not just about relationshiips...but about mental illness and the help many people are not able to receive.
TODAY I celebrate that I have a chance to learn more about my daughter and to share more of myself with her. We'll both benefit and hopefully one day we will be ready to reunite. We are going to take our time before that happens and I think this WILL happen in time...without a lot of painful sharing, but with open minds INSTEAD.
Hope you all...whoever you ARE "out there" can find some PEACE in your lives, as well. Jeremiah 29:11...a special verse for our family...says "I know the plans I have for you...for a future and a hope." THIS verse has kept us going all summer!
GOD'S BLESSINGS TO YOU ALL! That's all AlaneSays for this post!
There is a lot to SAY to each other and to HEAR from each other...but we are going to email till we get there...I am confident that we CAN get there.
My new FAMILY song is OH HOW HE LOVES US...one we've heard much this summer and one that has pulled my husband an myself through this tough time. We all need to be connected with the family God has given to us...It's quite a HUMAN thing. I know that as a mother I NEED that.
MOST of all we need our connection to God...through Jesus. HOPE YOU ALL find YOUR CONNECTION!!!
Thank you for caring enough to read my blog. Some of you may not have read from the BEGINNING, so if you want to further understand the reasons for MY blog...GO THERE. It's not just about relationshiips...but about mental illness and the help many people are not able to receive.
TODAY I celebrate that I have a chance to learn more about my daughter and to share more of myself with her. We'll both benefit and hopefully one day we will be ready to reunite. We are going to take our time before that happens and I think this WILL happen in time...without a lot of painful sharing, but with open minds INSTEAD.
Hope you all...whoever you ARE "out there" can find some PEACE in your lives, as well. Jeremiah 29:11...a special verse for our family...says "I know the plans I have for you...for a future and a hope." THIS verse has kept us going all summer!
GOD'S BLESSINGS TO YOU ALL! That's all AlaneSays for this post!
Tuesday, October 6, 2009
Working on my BLUES!
Just sent my blog "info" to Katie...ONE of the people I'm trying to reach...
She likely will not read it, but I feel it's worth a try.
Don't thing there's a big chance for reconciliation, but with God all things are possible...something her sister tries to assure me.
I think that it's a shame that I do this without TRYING to bring her to this blog. I've been concerned for HER...that this WILL upset her, but on the chance that she'll read and be open to it...I sent an email to invite her to read. She may never open the email. I've not been "allowed" to communicate...since she's told us that she won't OPEN anything we send.
We missed our grandson's birthday since she doesn't want us in her life...THAT was last week. I doubt that even with the blog to read and explain that she'll understand, but I figure it MIGHT help. I am told NOT to share this with her...but I feel I am able to override that...I'm in charge of myself and WANTED to do this.
So...HOPEFULLY someone else will let me know that what they've read has helped them. If commenting doesn't work...you can always send emails to jimandnancyf@yahoo.com.
WOULD LOVE TO HAVE FEEDBACK...from anyone!!!
ALANE SAYS OKAYBYE! (That IS one word in our family!)
She likely will not read it, but I feel it's worth a try.
Don't thing there's a big chance for reconciliation, but with God all things are possible...something her sister tries to assure me.
I think that it's a shame that I do this without TRYING to bring her to this blog. I've been concerned for HER...that this WILL upset her, but on the chance that she'll read and be open to it...I sent an email to invite her to read. She may never open the email. I've not been "allowed" to communicate...since she's told us that she won't OPEN anything we send.
We missed our grandson's birthday since she doesn't want us in her life...THAT was last week. I doubt that even with the blog to read and explain that she'll understand, but I figure it MIGHT help. I am told NOT to share this with her...but I feel I am able to override that...I'm in charge of myself and WANTED to do this.
So...HOPEFULLY someone else will let me know that what they've read has helped them. If commenting doesn't work...you can always send emails to jimandnancyf@yahoo.com.
WOULD LOVE TO HAVE FEEDBACK...from anyone!!!
ALANE SAYS OKAYBYE! (That IS one word in our family!)
Monday, October 5, 2009
Thursday, October 1, 2009
Good night...
We just returned from an evening of cards with friends. It was a fun time and we haven't done anything like this for a long time. I guess that it's fun to do something different. We taught a card game and learned one, too. It was a great time of sharing. I'm surprised because I'm usually challenged at card games, but both of these games were pretty easy. We hope learn and teach until we are done here on planet earth and are greatful for friends to share the fun. Next time we'll finish one of the games...the one we just learned. Can't wait to see how that one ends and we'll enjoy the ride, as well. It's kind of LIKE the "game" of LIFE! We never quite know what to expect, but things are interesting when we get to try something new.
These friends are becoming really important to us, but even though we'll be moving next summer, we have the joy of knowing they will be with us in Heaven! God is good!
This may not seem BIG to all of you out there, but I feel BLESSED to have experienced some PLAIN and SIMPLE fun!...AND I do feel that my meds are finally bringing me back to MYSELF! THANK YOU GOD!
Alane says "Good night to you all!"
These friends are becoming really important to us, but even though we'll be moving next summer, we have the joy of knowing they will be with us in Heaven! God is good!
This may not seem BIG to all of you out there, but I feel BLESSED to have experienced some PLAIN and SIMPLE fun!...AND I do feel that my meds are finally bringing me back to MYSELF! THANK YOU GOD!
Alane says "Good night to you all!"
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